I was talking to my nani today and she sounded very disillusioned with people around her, their life style, the environment, the next and the next generation. In her 83 years of staying in this planet, she was in a small town and the city of Bengaluru where simplicity and honest people ruled the roost. Being a very outgoing person she was always interactive with the outside world and would form some connection or the other with some acquaintance or the other. All these years nanaji who was non-interfering would let her have her way. There would be flocks and flocks of people who would be with her either during studies or during delivery of their first child or second or third or fourth. A sibling, a niece or nephews born and later every grandchild at her home had made her world complete. Today all her children are settled, grand children are grown ups with youngest being in the college atleast if not married, are in India or in other parts of the world. Her niece and nephews would visit her occasionally if they go to the city. Most of her relations are no more, she can't walk much and feels extremely lonely after Nana ji's demise. I was wondering how she is caught in the wrong side of the world. She just wants to go back to her old world and try to find people who think just like she does. Perhaps she doesn't understand that she and other people of her generation were just loooved by us. Their queer habits of having a fruit after dinner, their systematic lifestyle, the desperation to bring people together and meet more people, talk philosophy, buy sambar/rasam powder or paapad from an old, poor lady( instead of supermarket) is silently appreciated by her grand children. A systematic lifestye is something we can never follow however hard we try. Net never lures them and they are happy watching TV, talking about the new tailor in the neighbourhood instead of the beauty parlour. Their magazines are generally of regional language and they are always the best authority during functions and marriages. Pickles and delicious sweets are something which they produce without much effort. Children and grand children are always wished on their birthdays although there is no reminder set for them. And when they talk of philosophy or God or read texts on them, we wonder if we can remember those so that our children get to learn about good things in life. Walking for them means a brisk walk and meeting of friends and music to them is classical and they would have attended atleast 4-5 concerts in their lifetime.
For us internet is like oxygen. We think about our children like never before, see all remedies for simplest cough in the net, get lazy or tired OR get lazy and tired and have pizza often and dream of going in train to show our kids what is it all about. At our parents' place, we are not keen to follow their lifestyle but would rather create a small cocoon of comfort which we are used to when we are home. I wonder what is life all about? Are we spending too much time, energy and money on NOTHING? But we are not safe anywhere.
Not safe in play areas- children catch cold soon, not in schools, because of pressure of education, nor while travelling out, nor while sitting at home since news in TV or some programme or reality show is disturbing.
I cajoled my grandma to write a book on her experiences. People of my generation have a direction but still are not as efficient as them. Perhaps they were better with time management, their planning, their priorities of healthy food, their practical methods and never-say-die- spirit. I think the next time I meet her, I will try to cajole her to impart her worldly wisdom, her experiences gained, her thoughts, her family tree so that the next generation would know what the previous to previous to previous generation was all about instead of wondering about the same in movies.
