Written without prejudice
Aap ko kya lagta hai, sirf aap hi diary likhte hain aur main bezubaan nahin likh sakti apni aap beeti. Meri kahaani to saalon se wohi rahi hai aur ab to lagta hai, aisi hi rahegi aur kai saalon tak. Shaayad taa umr.
Main wohi sadak hoon jispar kabhi aapke dada ne thokar kaahyi hogi aur muhje yeh keh kar kosa hoga ke “iska to kuchh nahin ho sakta”. Aur shaayad aaj aap bhi kabhi kabhaar mujhe koste hongey jab kabhi aapka pair meri satah par baney anginat khaddon mein se kisi ek mein padh jaata hoga.
Pehli April log April Fool day ke naam se zyaada yaad rakhte hain aur gaahe bagaahey ek doosrey ki taang bhi kheenchtey hain. Aur isi fool’s day ko main thoda prasann ho jaati hoon. Chaunk gaye na? Ke aakhir mera iss din se kya vaasta hai?
Gaur se suno, iss din ka main takreeban 8 mahiney intezaar karti hoon. Phir hairaan ho gaye na? Aakhir kyun na karoon? Kuchh logon ke liye pehli April fool’s day hoga magar kuchhek chuninda logon ke liye yeh din financial year ki shuruaat hoti hai. Vitt varsh ka shubh aarambh. Ab aap poochengey ke muhje kyaa faayada hoga iss din ka?
Muhje raundney aur kosney waalon, bhool gaye, naye tender niklengey meri marammat karwane ke liye. Har varsh to yehi hota raha hai. Tender niklengey. Log bharengey. May mahiney mein meri marammat aarambh hogi. Marammat kya, sirf leepa poti hoti hai meri, kyunki marammat ki to guarantee hoti hai magar leepa poti ki …..?
Bhai jo kaam hi unhe leepa poti karne ke baad milta hai, uski kaun zimmedaari le? Bas ek hi baat ka to khyaal rakhna hota hai, ke barsaat ke shuru honey ke 2 saptaah ke andar mere wohi puraane, jaaney pehchaaney khaddey phir se ujaagar hone chaahiye. Agar zara badey aakaar mein ho jaayen to zyaada behtar hoga. Bhai agley varsh kuch aur paisa mila jaayega.
“Ke jannat ki haqeeqat hamein maaloom hai Ghalib, par dil ke khush rakhney ko yeh khyaal achha hai” in panktiyon ko apna aadarsh banakar kabhi kabhaar main apni tulna Dilli (New Delhi) se kar baithti hoon. Bhai, dono ki kahaani ek si jo thehri. Woh bhi kai baar ujadi aur kai baar basi. Lekin jab bhi punah basi to ek behtar roop lekar. Bas yehi ek farq hain hum dono mein. Main to bas bante hi ujad jaati hoon, phir kuch logon ki jeb paison se bharne ke liye.
Meri salaana gatividhiyaan kuch iss prakaar hain:
April – Tender niklega
May – Marammat hogi
June – Barsaat ka aagman aur dheere dheere meri satah ko kuredna.
July – Mere unn dhabbon ka punah prakat hona
August – Logon ka kosna shuru, wohi baaten, wohi taane, jinhe suntey suntey mere kaan pak gaye hain
September – August wali daastaan
October – Khaddey wahin ke wahin, magar barsaat samaapt hone ki wajah se gandey paani ke cheentey nahin udahtey, to logon ka kosna zara kam hona.
November – App aur main dono abhyast ho jaatey hain.
December – Dono apney dukh bhool jaatey hain
January – November aur December ka mishran
February – January ka roopantar
March – Aap ka to muhje pata nahin, meri to ummeed phir se jaag jaati hai, bhai agley mahiney ki pehli tareekh ko, bewakoofon ka din jo aa raha hai.
Waise hai yeh bewakoofon ka din hi, kya jeev (jaise aap log) aur kya nirjeev (jaise main), sab bewakoof bantey hain. Main yeh jaantey hue bhi ke meri sundarta sirf kuch dino ki mehmaan hogi, intezaar karti hoon iss din ka. Aur kuchh log intezaar karte hain ke kab yeh din aaye aur meri marammat ke bahaney apne kuch kaam karwaa liye jaayen.
Aap to ek din yeh duniya chhod kar chale jaaogey aur chhod jaaogey apney potey potiyon ko wohi baatein dohraaney ke liye, jinhe kabhi aapke poorvajon ne kaha tha. Aur sunney ko main hoon na. Aapki abhaagin, peedit, dukhi sadak.
Magar jeeyungi yeh ummed lekar,
Ke koi to aisi peedhi aayegi,
Jo shayad mera dukh samajh paayegi
Samasya to sabhi jaantey hain
woh shayad iska samadhan bhi lekar aayegi
