Are men to be blamed?
Am I feminist? I do not know! In fact I am more comfortable being among men rather than women. I met this woman from IT field and she is earning a decent salary working for an MNC. Married and a Mom. But if she has to step out of her house she needs her husband. She earns more than him and even contributes to most of their family expenses. Yet she would not do one thing without her husband's approval. Why are woman still so dependent on men? Why do they do this? Is the man to be blamed or these woman who like being taken care of by men and hence impose these disabilities on them? Without her husband she is a handicap who cannot go around anywhere on her own( work is an exception though - somehow!). And when I hear to women cribbing about this, not realizing the fault is theirs, I find it hard to keep my cool and listen to them. Am so afraid that I might snap out and say something that might hurt the other person. And who am I to get into their family matters anyway! So yeah am more comfortable being among men, who discuss stock market, cricket etc.
Men are given opportunities based on their potential while women are given opportunities based on their performance. Is it true?
I attending a corporate women leadership forum today. Women from different companies, with varied skills, positions and ages were there. All of us had one question. Repeatedly, over and over asked, discussed and debated. The issue was - MEN. Everything boiled down to dealing a man, unfortunately. Diversity! . How do you overcome this bias?
I am not sure this is true. But all those examples, case studies complemented it. However, there were exceptions too( all those panelists, key notes speakers - well yeah all these successful women). But the pyramid of women in leadership was too narrow and too steep. Stats say 50% of engineering college students are girls. So why is there only 5% when it comes to the top ladder?
What does it take to be a Man?
There was a man( Prakash Belawadi - a journalist, and an actor from the movie Madras Cafe) among the panelists too. He mentioned that all those aspects of being a woman should only be taken as an advantage when compared to men. Men should actually adopt these, rather than women trying to change/ see them as their negatives. A woman performs 9 out of 10 tasks assigned to her exceptionally well, but fails in 1. But she is stuck to that one failure. She admits it. Many women today saw it as being tactless in not being able to project the good to cover up the bad. Men like Prakash see it as being open and honest. Men go and meet anyone and make friends with him. They socialize over a coffee, smoke or a cocktail party. If a woman approaches or tries to be too social she is judged for her character. It does not matter what a man wears to a board meeting, but it matters what a woman wears. Say if a lady wore flip flops like Steve Jobs to one of the board meetings, would she even be considered a leader?
And if one knows women, this list would go on and on. One thing they are for no doubt good at is cribbing, expressing their emotions, problems. I personally think men are equally shy, socially uncomfortable. Men nowadays are into the kitchen. Into taking care of kids. I know of many of my colleagues who baby sit when their wifes HAD to go to work. I know of many men who do not treat you as a weaker gender but respect them for being their equal or more than that. We woman have so many advantages working for us - we have this unique intuition which is very important when you are directly working with clients. Our minds are more irrational than men. And on top of it, we can empathize better, connect better. We talk a lot, hence better communicators. So be yourself. A Woman. And be proud of this fact.
If at all someone is to be blamed for why women are where they are today, in countries especially like India - the women themselves.