I read this somewhere - "Greatest illusion of life is the Innocence". I guess its true, only when the reality dawns on you, one realizes how blinded they are with respect to the view of the real World. You were scared in childhood, of ghosts, of devils, not knowing they were fictional. Later as you grow you realize there are more things you need to be scared of than those which do not exist. I really was very scared of these things and even till date I do not watch any horror movies. There were nights in my childhood when I thought I wont make it till the morning cause something was going to eat me up and I just prayed and prayed till it was morning. But the next morning I did not even remember the nightmare. On the contrary and on the positive side, today I can sleep peacefully
all alone( of course with my pet). I know what is fiction and what is fact. On the negative side, now, there are so many devils inside my head that eat me up day and night. When did you grow up so much that you failed to see the day and the night separately? And I read and watch Fiction a lot cause fictional world seems better than the real world.
I thought friends were forever. They are the family. Only ones with whom you share a secret. You laugh, you play, you fight with. My innocence did not tell me that someday people part and they are gone, when life happens. Today, luckily I have siblings and they seem to be the best friends who were there all the time. I just did not see them, and thought they were the best enemies. What about those who do not have any siblings? How do they cope being alone in this big world? On paper I seem to have many many friends today than those exclusive few friends who were only for you. Should I be happy for the life happening to me or to them?
Competition was to win. To be the best. To be the first. To be the smartest. To be the one who runs faster. To be the one who scores the high. Not be cheating but by playing the game fair. Now, none of these things matter in the race. When did these definitions change? Honesty, integrity seem to be a loser's cup of tea now. How easy was it to trust then. Trust a thing, a person. Is there truly anyone whom you could really really trust your life with? Not the family members of course. Guess it all says why people started building barriers, bridges, borders. There were times when people took advantage, people cheated, people broke the trust. But now all of us have learnt, tackled and withstood. But to be always on check for who the next one is to be careful of?
I wonder where all the time I had as a child is gone now. Time lying on a terrace and watching the stars, when there was a separate time slot in the day to PLAY. Not just go to school and study, but PLAY. Where did the summer vacations go? Where did all the relatives go? Now you don't remember when was the last time you saw the sun rise or set. Relatives are only a nuisance now. No one stays more than a week or two anymore. I wonder how we used to spend months together at someone else's place. Everyone wants to leave and get back to their own cozy cocoons. And what is a vacation now? Just a time off from work. You really don't care where you go and what you do and how you spend and who you spend your time with. Just hit the road and be someplace. Somewhere lost. You have already seen the place in pictures before you go, enquired with people who had been there, you even have a weather forecast. Where did the curiosity in life go? Oh well, yest its just a click away. For everything you just click. Click, Click and Click.
Should one be happy or sad for being innocent? Is Innocence a flaw?
