This recent experience of our family's carpenter Mr X, who is from a small village in UP. Over the years X eventually bought a small flat in Mumbai, educated his children and now runs a successful carpentry workshop. Last year, his graduate daughter got engaged to a boy of her choice who has a good job on a ship. The fiance went off on a long voyage, and the marriage was to take place on his return this month. About a month ago, the girl took Rs 50 from her mother, and went out of the house in the afternoon to buy a phone top up. She disappeared without a trace. By late evening, the parents were frantic. The police told X that his daughter is a major who must have run away with her boyfriend. This was unbelievable. Their daughter was engaged to the man of her own choice. A desperate X and his wife did the rounds of their neighbourhood but could not find out anything. After a few days, someone said that he had seen the girl being pushed into a Santro by a local known goonda and some other boys. When X narrated this to the police, they refused to register an FIR but only wrote down an NC, that too after a lawyer hanging around at the police station offered to intervene – of course for a substantial fee. After giving more money to the police, they went to the goonda's house. The mother and brother of the goonda did not know where he was. The police did not pursue the matter. After about 15 days we learnt about this incident through someone else. We called X hoping for the best. X came the next day with all his papers. He was on the verge of collapse, as any parent of a missing child would be. The lawyer and the police were taking him for a right royal ride. The fiancé of the girl was expected to return that day and he did not know how to face him. We immediately arranged a habeas corpus petition to be filed. The High Court directed the police to produce the girl and the goonda before the court within 3 days, sternly remarking that just because a girl is a major does not mean she could not be kidnapped. "Miraculously" the police immediately located the two in a remote village in the Bondla forest of Goa. The police thrashed the goonda's brother who spilled the beans. X and the fiancé accompanied the police to Goa and brought the duo back from the house of the goonda's sister.
Now the matter gets murky. X and the fiancé did not want to file any complaint against the goonda, nor for the girl to be medically examined as proposed by the police. The girl said she had been kidnapped by the goonda who was forcing her to marry him, but he had not touched her thanks to his sister's insistence. The police Affidavit stated that the girl eloped with the goonda boy but concocted the kidnapping story after she saw her father and fiance. X did not deny the contentions and withdrew his petition. The fiancé agreed to marry the girl but his parents now oppose the marriage. X has sent the girl and her fiance to the village in UP for sometime, so that memories fade. The fiancé promises to marry her as soon as he convinces his parents. God knows …….. It appears that the girl did elope with the goonda boy whom she must have become interested in after her fiancé went on his ship. She changed her mind again, after eloping, perhaps realising that her fiancé was a better bet for marriage. Whatever the reason, it is a scandalous incident by any standards, more so for this class of society which is shackled by customary mores.
The poor parents have suffered grievous emotional torment for more than a month, not knowing the fate of their daughter and only imagining the worst. They have lost face and are utterly shamed in society. The mother hesitates to step out of her front door and the father hangs his head in shame. No parent could ever bear the terrible thought of a missing child, that too a young girl. So, girls and boys, please spare a thought on the repercussions your deeds will have on your parents for no fault of theirs. There is no fate worse than the turmoil caused by a missing child – this is a living death for the parents. Parents always do the best they can within their means to give their children a good life and education, often sacrificing their own comforts for the betterment of the child. Do your parents deserve the shame, the cruel whispers of an unforgiving society, the unbearable pain of not knowing what has befallen you? Even if you cannot do good for your parents, at least spare them the trauma of a foolish and avoidable act.
