“Life is all about choices we make”. Yes we have choices. We can choose. In this world where we live have a multidimensional kaleidoscope and I guess so has every single quote - a different dimension. Every mind has its own way of interpreting and understanding the world from its own dimension.
As a mother of two, I always chose to be mother above everything else. ‘Everything' – it meant my love for my kids was above the books I loved to sleep and wake up with, the unexplored world I dream of, the words I always loved to play with. I often had choices but I always felt that being the mother is the right choice.
The greatest lessons of life that we learn come when we least expect them and from people we could hardly imagine from. They need not rattle us instantaneously always; sometimes a soft nudge is enough to change the path.
It was the time when my son was six year old, old enough to understand the directions yet young enough to resist the temptations. His weakness for sweets made it at times tough for me to handle him but at the same time love him even more.
One fine day he came and asked for more than one dessert after his meal. He saw pastries in the fridge and knew about the laddoos I made for him.
I told him “You can have laddoo OR pastry” he nodded and went. Later I saw him enjoying a laddoo.
After some time when I checked my refrigerator there was an anomaly in the number of pastries I last checked.
So I asked if he had relished one.
He answered “yes”
It was for the first time he disobeyed me – yes bit perturbing.
“Aryan I asked you to have either one but not both” I reasoned him.
He innocently replied “You said you can have laddoo OR(Aur/and) Pastry. So you only told me to have both”
I was not ready for this reply. “Aryan I meant OR – means either of two and not Aur as in Hindi that means ‘and’ ”
“How do I know that ma” he simply shrugged.
I opened my mouth but had nothing to say. It was simple interpretation. Language was not a barrier; mind simply understood what it wanted to. I could not do anything but frown with the thought “Englis is a phunny language”
Although I made the concepts clear for him for the future but this Or/Aur conflict bugged me somewhere subconsciously. Why, I could not figure out.
A few days later it was a casual meet of the mothers in the garden area where kids,family and maids are the prime topics of discussion, rose a topic where I started ‘I wanted to do something but you know I had to choose being mother OR….
I stopped! I could not speak further. I figured out what was wrong. I had whole concept mistaken. Life is all about choices, but life has given us the opportunity to choose none to infinite. There is no lower and upper limit in choosing. We can choose nothing OR everything. We can choose this and that and the list might trail beyond the horizon.
In this world the word ‘choice’ mostly entitles us to choose between one OR another but this life has a different meaning of ‘choice’ – it lays a platter in front of us and smiles at us letting us pick one or handful – that depends on us.
This time I chose to be a student who continued her studies and completed a two year degree with 8.6 CGPA. I chose to be a writer who always felt good after writing. I chose to be an independent person who explored the world around her on her own. I chose to be a teacher who always felt that her little contribution might make a small difference in the society. AND I never stopped being the mom I always was and will be. There is much more in store for me because this OR/AUR – has a different meaning now and I am still learning to pick my choices from the platter till my hands are full.
