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AamAadmi’s Eternal Tips to Impress an AamAurat ;-)
Jan 18, 2008 05:04 PM 6764 Views
(Updated Jan 18, 2008 05:35 PM)

Note: Impress means To be Genuinely Appreciated by women


Disclaimer: Pauli’s exclusion principle says ‘no 2 electrons can have all 4 quantum numbers same’. Similarly no 2 women are impressed by the same method. revu is purely by insight, learning, observation & near 0 personal experience.


Axioms: A woman 1) can’t be impressed w/o her permission


2) can pretend to be impressed even when she isn’t & the converse is true too


3) May not know what impresses her if she doesnt know herself!


4) is given special intuition abilities & complex mind by god (only he understands them ;-)]


5) cant be impressd longterm with the same trick. Ex: women will get fed up of roses soon ;-)


Defining the Variables: Kindly note that this is a rough nomenclature & is subject to uncertainty principle that follows. Based on physical, emotional, mental, intellectual, spiritual maturity female of our species can be categorized as – Girls, Women & Real women! For a better picture girls are impressionable, bubbly, talkative, trying to shape themselves around celebs, live in the feelings realm. Women is a matured version of the girl, mostly married & knows the realities, more practical. Finally the real woman! ;-)


Heisenberg’s uncertainty principle: In female quantum mechanics it states that ‘one can never be sure about stage a female is in ie the three categories co-exist anytime. its not surprising to see female displaying traits of being a girl, woman, real woman – all within a span of minutes. Considering this a man can never be sure if he has impressed the girl, woman, or the real woman in a female” By the way, the above stages are also part of the growth of a female person ;-)


First principles & conspiracy theory: In Eden Gardens (not Kolkata) Adam, Eve lived in perfect harmony until sin entered their lives. Bcos of this the very Adam who said of his woman “this is the bone of bone, flesh of my flesh” later complained “God, the woman you gave me caused all trouble” … this story continues even now! That’s when man-woman complaining against each other began & gave birth to a million jokes that come by email & talk of the mutual fear, suspicion, contempt they have for each other. The market took this opportunity & came out with books on ‘how to’ & ‘Men from Pluto, women from plato’ or TOI articles on how to get male attention by dressing skimpily! Much of this content being human wisdom has only created skewed images about the other gender in their minds. Lets not forget the florist who with the help of media have programmed the mankind telling them –“give a rose’ & tell the girl “rose = love’. Both behave in a programmed way & ride on feelings, while the florist makes hay. ‘Perfect Love casts away all fears’ – If you can recreate a paradise back in you, you will realize there is no need to impress or be impressed!


Until Then: While you recreate paradise here are time-tested tips that win admiration from real women. While the tips will forbid you from touching her body, you will have touched her feelings (heart), her intellect & inner being (mind&soul).


What women want: A man once conducted a survey of woman with 2 questions a)what do you want in a man? b)if you wanted men to know one thing, what would it be?


Answers: for the first question most common answer was faithful & honest followed by respectful, loving, caring, pure, god-fearing. Together these 6 answers accounted for 90% responses while commonly held myth qualities like color, body etc never featured. thats Salman unmarried, while rajpal yadav has a beautiful wife? ;-) For the second question top answers were ‘girls want men to know how to treat like a lady’ & ‘love me for who I am, not just my body’! Now being a gentleman is not just opening the door to a girl, if so, bus conductors would get all girls ;-) If you are practicing the above, unawares you are alredy impressing women ;-) in summary,


Respect: Women like men who respect womanhood. So make sure you talk highly about your mother, sister etc. Don’t think of faking here becos most women have ESP & can sense your motives. When you respect them they feel secure that you are not looking them as an object & you are not using your eyes as a measuring tape! Beware they can read your eyes. I once read a lady’s profile that had this sentence “I am a person entrapped in a woman’s body”. She elaborated that every man was only talking about her body, forgetting that she is a human person! Respect of women is not complete without respect for their bodies.


Trust: in a tamil movie the hero-heroine end up having to share a single room. The girl asks boy to sleep on the floor. He says ‘I have full trust in myself; if you don’t trust urself u can sleep on the floor’. Both sleep on the cot & wake up nothing having happened. But from then on the girl is impressed at his character! I had a chance to relive this scene in a night journey bus, where the seat next to me had a girl. The girl & everyone else began chanting I move to some other seat. I objected for I had to leave a window seat & go to last seat, also my integrity was being doubted by ppl who didn’t know me. I dropped a bomb back saying ‘I know I am good boy, if the girl sees threat in me, let her move away’. The girl smiled & sat there.


A listening Friend: it is studied that a 2 year old girl speaks 3 times more words than a same aged boy! & the figures only increase from there ;-) Women talk more, so they need someone to listen. Good listeners make good friends. Its not that you just have to listen you can talk also bcos women like to have good conversations. For them attraction is through ears just as attraction is thru eyes for men. Women like good communicators.


Humor & intelligence: this is one more quality women appreciate even though at times they are too dumb to catch the joke ;-) just see the female fan following the likes of Shyam baba, FE, doc have here on MS ;-) every human likes to smile, but since not many are able to create jokes or act funny there is always a demand for such people. If you have a good SOH, chances are that women are impressed by you, though they have never told it to you. Also be careful not to cross lines in SOH by uttering non-veg jokes or jokes that degrade women or their bodies. Though they manage to give a dry smile, they aren’t impressed. real women will ask the joker ‘don’t you have mother & sisters’!! Attempted comedy shudnt be a tragedy on u ;-)



Values: Take out the outer mask & make-up most of our women are very innocent & family bound. If they see a guy holding on to Indian values, family values not only the girl, their folks will also be impressed. When it comes to long-term relationships any religiousness, values, habit free nature of the guy are key reasons a girl & her folk like in a man, besides his IT job ;-)


thanks for reading, comments welcome .. but spare the roses, they look so better on plants ;-)


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