The God of 'Living' things. Review on Choosing a Doctor

* This review, in no way, aims at mocking or belittling the service rendered by the medical professionals.Still there might be a few interested in sending Brickbats.Make sure you send Bricks & Bat seperatly, so that I could make good use of it . Read on now -

Never consult a Doc who says:

• Sister please add 20 ml of water to make it AB positive from A positive . Thus the term'laugh all the way to the Blood Bank' was coined.

  
  




• So you do not feel like eating something spicey, congrats Mr Singh, aap maa'nahi' banne wale hain .

  
  




• Hand me hammer and a few nails .

  
  




• Hang on nurse, I asked the patient to remove his shirt.

  
  




• Bhai, pair toot gaye toh kya karoge, langda ke chalo.

  
  




• Congrats! we have decided to name the disease after you.

  
  




• No, you need not undergo further tests, you came to me for your treatment, that in itself is the biggest proof of your mental status.

  
  

-  mubarak ho!aap ma banne wale hain, waise aapke shadi toh ho gaye hai na?

• There are three kinds of wards: general wards, private wards & afterwards.

  
  




• Bhai, tum sign karoge ya nahi?

  
  




• Your postmortem report says you are terminally ill.

  
  




• Can you see these black spots in the CT scan? all over your brain? suggesting something fatal? like cancerous growth? do you know what does that mean? it means'ki bhaiya'photo' aache nahi aay hai, phir se lene hoge'.

  
  




• Congrats! your wife is a mom now, kindly pass this good news to the father of the new born baby .

  
  

-Sorry, hum unhe bacha nahi paye, wo khud hi baach gaye.

• There's something in your stomach, probably my cell phone.

  
  




• Is this your wife or your'First AIDS Box'?

  
  




• Hausla rakho, lekin fees idhar karo.

  
  




• Inhe dawa aur dua dono ki jarorat hai aur ab H.K. Dua ka number maat pochna for God sake.

  
  

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Can you identify with these patients.

• Dactar saheb, cupboard mein toh nurse hai, medicines kahan hain?

  
  




• Dactar saheb, main aapke'fish' le aaya .

  
  




• Dactar saheb, ye aapne operation kiya hai ya Embroidery?

  
  




• What is this docter? you gave me just'one' prescription and asked me to eat'one' thrice everyday.

  
  

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Never consult a doc, who prior to  joining this profession did some other job.

Lawyer: We  successfully'planted' the kidney/Point noted, is this the final statement or you have to make any changes?

Union leader:  Veins on strike, no blood circulation today.

Bhai: Killed all the nurse' and assistants who were witness to the operation.

Terrorist: R(D)x -'goli' khao. calling Mr Singh, operation successful, the patient is dead.

S/W professional: upload blood sister . Take these softwares, upload one twice everyday.

Politician: tum party badal dalo .

The other docs are just fine.