Aug 04, 2005 03:10 PM
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(Updated Aug 04, 2005 03:55 PM)
Welcome to the world of ‘prime time ‘serials. If you are watching any of those deluge of serials aired between 7 30 and 10 in the night for more than a year and still not made a trip to a psychologist, you must pat yourself on the back for your mental strength or you must be someone who can sleep with eyes open.
Across languages, these serials have a lot of things in common. They are all either a remake or a copy or an assembly of another serial(s) in a different language ( sometimes, the same language –you may be actually watching a new serial, while your brain is under the impression that it is a re-telecast of some other serial!!). It is worth examining some of the fundamentals of these serials - This are not specific to any serials – they are all the same anyway, so, I have not picked up the names.
Superwoman
Usually the heroine , this lady is a sati savitri at home. She does all activities at home and deals successfully with a straying husband, the wicked mother-in-law, a mentally deranged sister of her husband , a dog that never barks at strangers.…..you name it and our superwoman knows how to handle them. The list is not complete !! This superwoman is also a champion at workplace, signing deals worth crores of rupees and negotiating mergers between Citibank and American Express Bank even if she is not employed by both of them . She is usually from a ‘middle class’ and her rich and jealous in-laws will periodically call her as ‘ that middle class two-bedroom lady “ !! She has infinite patience and will forgive her husband even after he has slept with another woman for the millionth time. She will be replaced every six months by a new face.
Man with defects
Usually the hero, he will have the looks of a chimpanzee and yet, there will be a million women ready to fall all over him. He is rich and will be in love with the superwoman until their wedding. If he creates too many problems for the producer about his salary, he will lose his life in an accident . He will commit adultery at least twice in every episode and go back to the superwoman with a confession.
Villian
She will be one of the in-laws or relatives of the Superwoman and her only task on earth is to plot the downfall of the superwoman. She will use many tricks and our superwoman will beat them all, but the villain never gives up. She can be easily identified with a shining lipstick and painted eyelashes. She will successfully pass her genes to her offsprings.
Other Fundas
-Accidents will happen in almost every other episode in the 817349625 episodes.
-Every 30 minute episode will have a 5 minute title song, a five minute break, 5 minute recap, another 5 minute break, 5 minutes of the episode and a five minute concluding music – not necessarily in that order - The recap and the episode could be the same sometimes. It is the responsibility is of the viewer to figure out which is what and collate them all.
-A Mega-serial will cover a minimum of sixty generations, with the first generation super woman looking younger than the fifty ninth generation daughter.
-Marriages and Divorces will happen between the Superwoman and the hero more frequently than changing clothes.
-Every episode will have one character shedding tears and one dramatic event.
-While the mundane conversations will go untapped, a secret discussion on how to kill someone will always be overheard .
-The hero will always walk in when the superwoman is giving a ‘friendly hug’ to a male colleague and suspect her of cheating.
These are a ‘must have’ s for every serial to be considered for the Parivar awards and every actor\actress who wins the award will thank Ekta Kapoor and all the troop members for sparing the helpless viewers during the remaining hours in the day.
