Chics and chicken burgers and burger king. Review on Naqab

If you want to know who produced the movie it was burger king as they get the pride of promotion out of this silly hocus pocus which is obsessed with showing the red and black panties of its leading lady who looks more like a model than an actress and she is the only good thing to look at in this inanity by abbas mustan which doesnt have one single good track surprisingly as all their movies usually have good music .

the plot remixes reality cinema with virtual reality  where a love triangle is shown being played between 2 strangers as a reality show without the female lead [urvashi ]being aware of the crap plot being planned by her real life boyfriend [bobby deol ]who hires an unemployed mumbai actor [akshay khanna]to romance her in dubai, where the going gets tough as the whole cast plays it straight out of the most foolish story of the year, with almost a flaw in every frame as the lovers meet each other on sites from sleazy clubs to beach festivals to having free dinners in a hilariously silly sequence on the roof top ofhyatt regency which totally defies logic, it seems hyatt paid the producers too for product placement but as they are the secondary  promoters for this bollywood blunder, so they get less mileage then **burger king

the girl looks good from her expressionless closeups to her crotch closeups shot in the red panties in a dance sequence and is pretty and maybe will be able to act with a good director .she works in dubai s burger king branch and goes to work on a bike [blue moped ]wearing a pretty blue matching helmet which wanted me to call her little miss blue riding hood and is stalked by everyone in the movie except the big bad wolf without being aware of it,

from goa to dubai she is stalked by every tom dick and harry with knives and digital hand held cameras but is blind to all these intruders, alas all pretty girls were in reality such bimboos then it wouldve been such a delightful world for all  us bad men, but she also serves people chicken burgers in this movie as it seems like burger king wanted the director to sell their ckicken burger,

next time please dont forget to order a chicken burger in burger king, at least the american corporates will further hire more bollywood movies to do their promotion as it all seems to be about product placement rather than entertainment, as the only thing missing is the name of the knife with which poor miss blue riding hood is struck in a sequence and while she is stabbed in the shoulder the scar is on her wrist, indeed that was something called scene continuity being challanged at the cost of the audience credibility .

akshay khanna  is short, bald, not so handsome and in this he has added a paunch which is very visible in the movie, his costumes consist mainly of a  t-shirt worn over a shirt trying desperately  to hide the obese tummy but alas it doesnt work,

as for bobby he wears a pink satin shirt in one sequence with gems studded in the collar and cuffs appropriately with hisblond dyed hair, giving us no further  problems as to guessing his true sexuality, as for his acting prowess its nil as ever and this effort seals his fate for ever, if shaka laka and jhoom barabar were not enough to do so, i hope he packs his bags and leaves us in peace now .

the rest of the cast is bad too, as are the songs which are scarce anyway, one is in the title where the heroine models for the camera for almost 10 minutes [YES ITS GOT TO BE SEEN TO BE BELIEVED ]and the other two are in a club and a beach festival where an arab singer makes a real fool out of himself by singing in arabic in the funniest song of the year, he seems to have been hired very cheaply as he was fat, ugly and couldnt sing at all  AND im sure he was paid ten dirhams for his guest role as for the third song it is the one where urvashi wears and shows her famed red panties in a ballet like song dance very badly choreographed and it shows how desperate the bimboo is for a hit and fame, as she cant act at all, maybe she needs to stick to modelling alone as for which products its all to obvious by her choice in this movie alone .

the reality versus virtual reality  movie wins awards globally  at every festival from cannes [oopsi ]to goa it sweeps the globe in a miraculous way having been shot bydigital hand held cameras [blair witch project ]its the toast of the globe as its reality cinema in abbas mastan style, but not for this movie as this is bollywoods deadliest nightmare, a real crap movie which seems to have been made according to the crap director  [bobby deol directing the virtual reality show ]who declares very proudly that he made the movie only to get his sex scenes between the 2 leads right as according to him that was the only way to shoot natural sex,

the rest of the plot  is about revenge as it is wrecked upon the un suspecting producer director team  by the duo [the two leads of the virtual reality movie who feel enraged at being cheated ], and how they execute it is even more clumsy then the pre-interval portions which were quite silly in themslelf, but the absurd  climax has to be seen to be believed .

this is the duo abbas mastan at their worst, even tarzaan the car was better according to my friend who saw it with me and as for 36CT, it was a delight with good comedy and a really  good musical score .

this is to be avoided at your own risk unless you just want to see the naked charms of a pretty girl, which wasnt enough for me and the insipid obscenity got on my nerves and gave me a headache .

the photography is just ordinary and it makes the actress who works for a living in burger king as a waitress the centrepiece of this mess, as for burger king ive yet to see such a pretty girl who needs to work there as a waitress, but it might be true in dubai though the only pretty girls I saw in dubai were in clubs or in 5 star hotels or in shopping malls, but ill remember to check the burger king next time im in dubai,

dont forget to order your chicken burgers from BKas it is part of your civic duty now otherwise bollywood will lose its product placement campaign

cheerio

have fun

but avoid this over this weekend

harry potters much better but its still not on database but ive requested it

thanks for reading

oz