WMD's Found !!. Review on My Ten Least Favorite Foods

After many milliseconds of research the unexplained has been explained. It is what teams of experts scouring vast expanses using the latest technology could not explain. The WMD ie Weapons of Mass Destruction of Appetite have been found ! My travails with bad food are epics which deserve a trilogy like the Lord of the Rings. But being an unassuming person I'll keep it down to the length of an item-song :)

In life people eat bad food because sometimes simply there's no other alternative. Kya karen paapi pet ka sawal hain.

(What to do? it's the stomach's fault that its hungry).

I've survived bad food in Andhra. My aunt's Idlis, which my uncle claimed could knock out a burglar. 4 years of very spicy hostel food, after which I had partially morphed into a half dragon. And when I thought I'd survived the worst, I was wrong. Fate had a cruel twist for me.....

A few years back, I'd come to the US, hoping that I'd enjoy the multinational cuisine in America. Little did I then know that Ignorance is bliss. But student life with limited pockets means, you become your own personal gourmet chef.

My cooking was bad, how bad you ask me? Well people used to come to my house to eat my cooking. Not because it was delicious, but because most of them wanted to go on diets. It was a desi version of cold turkey, for food.

But time has passed, gf's have changed, ducklings have become swans.

Well I've not become a great cook, only decent gourmet stuff. But as a consultant, a nice perk is an expense account :). So I get to pick and choose the best of the best.

But based on my experiences I've shortened it into the following:

In Random order the top 10 contestants for the Bad Food Pageant

Broccoli- A vegetable which needs to banned from human consumption, which has absolutely no taste. Its kind of hard and chunky too. Add it to any dish and it doesn't imbibe any flavor. It stays as broccoli.

Meat- As a veggie, I don't eat meat. no offense to the meat-eaters. EOS.

Marie biscuits- Only people whose tongues have died and hospital patients deserve this biscuit. It is the cockroach of the biscuit world. Even nuclear holocaust cannot destroy this.

Lady's finger or Okra- A gooey vegetable, eating which reminds you of the blob. If the Okra is not ripe its like a brick.

Salads- When did people regress into the Stone Age. Salad is for cows and other bovine creatures. A leafy WMDA.

Dry Chappathis - You have some good items like pooris. the dry chappatis are like cotton cloth. A solid WMDA.

Guacamole- A staple ingredient in Mexican food, this is a green chutney-like stuff, only thing its made from avocados and tastes bad.

Dal-Chawal- This is something my friends from Bombay used to relish. A bland item made from toor dal, even when its spicy, at best its a side-dish, not a main entree.

Half Boiled eggs- The yellow yolk of the egg is not cooked and it freely ventures out. A liquid WMDA if any.

Andhra food-A lot of my friends are from AP. But by God, most of these people have a penchant for spice. Sorry pals. But spicy doesn't mean it has to burn your tongue and esophagus to pass your quality control.

Drop your kudos and complaints in the Comments box. Adios Amigos.