Dear Kareena,
Kyon Ki I adore you, I was determined to make it to this movie, though most friends rejected this one by the look of the promos itself and said it will be sick.
Kyon Ki I love you, I did miss out a vital part of today’s match between India and Sri Lanka, just because I went to see you.
Kyon Ki you are my dream girl, I did not let the negative review even by Taran Adarsh stop me from watching you in this movie.
...But all done, you have disappointed me big time! If not something great, I expected atleast some above-average stuff from this movie, and most importantly, you. I leave it upto you to say, is expecting a decent product from the one you adore too much? Then sorry, I have let you down. But allow me to analyze my feelings...
What I expected
While entering the auditorium, I thought that Priyan being the man behind the movie, a good script was ensuing. Though most of his movies lack logic, this wasn’t a comedy movie as his other release of the same day, Garam Masala.
What I got
I got some story that had been lifted from a movie of the 1980’s.
A TDH guy Anand (Salman Khan) dearly loved Maya (Rimi Sen), who preferred to be a nun for the rest of the life, and serve humankind. So even though she too fell for Salman, she didn’t reciprocate. Once convinced (by Salman) that even God didn’t want someone to serve him by sacrificing her joy, she declares her love for him. She is always up to playing pranks on Salman. Once, assuming it to be another prank, Salman throws her is s swimming pool. Given that she can’t swim, she dies.
Under the impression that it was he who had killed her, Salman loses his mental balance, and lands up in a mental hospital, with Tanvi (You, my dear) later taking up the responsibility to cure him, and make him regain his memory.
You, with the aid of one of Salman’s relative Sunil (Jackie Shroff), succeed in her mission. But you now fallen in love with his patient. As expected by then, your father Dr. Khurana (Om Puri - working in the same asylum too) comes across as a baddie, your marriage in already fixed to Karan (Suniel Shetty).
What happens next.. is for anyone to guess!
What went wrong?
Practically everything, I can sum it up in two words. But still, considering I’ll have to explain, it will take a lot of time. So let’s talk about a few positives first.
In the very beginning, when Salman is admitted to the asylum, some of the scenes do evoke laughter. One of them is the P.T. exercise, where he tries various tricks to create havoc. Thereafter, he is given the first shock. During that, he recalls his life, and certain vibes go through his mind, reminding him of his lost love Maya. This raises some false hopes for the proceedings to pick up.
Now the negatives. I just said that the initial scenes involving Sallu in the asylum are funny, but that completely deviates from the plot. What was he there for? For bringing candles for his colleagues, resulting in him getting bashed up? For entertainment, wanting songs in the speakers? Or to intermittently recalling his past life, and then forgetting all about it? Clearly, what the director wanted to convey in not bought to the fore in a coherent manner!
Then begins the flashback, which you read through a notebook of Salman. One actually feels that the story will gather momentum in that part atleast, but even the flashback is so slow-paced that it puts off the viewer completely. The interval point, where Rimi is thrown into the swimming pool, and dies, appears to be too filmy. In the party, did no one notice her drowning? Didn’t she scream for help even once? Moreover, the impact is not as effective as it should have been.
But I find you aren’t listening to me.
The second half begins with you all set to cure his memory. But what do you do? Just take him out to show him the sun and the moon? And sing songs with him? Finally, how do you manage to accomplish in your mission? By singing back the same song he sang for his Maya? The effect is not that great. Much more effort needed to be put behind it. His memory comes back way too easily.
And then, what happens after it is back? The love story of the two of you begin. But hey, the main plot of the story was Salman losing his mental balance because of his guilt-consciousness. Was it given a damn? Didn’t he feel sorry about it now? Why was he so merry on recovering? I am sure the makers have no answer to this one.
But I do. You. Yes, seeing you made him forget everything. That’s fine. But dear, that contradicts Salman being a true lover of Rimi. Tere Naam was way ahead of this one, with him sacrificing his whole life for his lover. That’s what I call true love, not this.
What happens then? Haven’t we seen lovers facing parental opposition? Same here, with Om Puri disapporoving of your relation to Salman. Moreover, Sunil Shetty’s track is very much unwarranted. He comes and goes. No one knows from where, and where to! The motive behind his support doesn’t come across so strongly too.
The climax is intended to melt the hearts of the viewers, but the effort behind it is half-hearted. Your becoming Patient No. 36 was anticipated by the happenings in the pre-climax.
P.S. There is a scene in the film where a clean shaven Salman gets a shave by you. But don’t you think that Jackie needed one, and not him?
Performance-wise, I was impressed by Salman Khan. He got into the skin of the character and passed out with flying colours. If he was excellent as the mental patient, he was amazing as the lover who did all sorts of things to get his lady love.
Kareena... Why did you do this to me? Nothing wrong with your performance, but you were hardly there in this movie. You had more screen time in the second half, but not that much as you deserved to. You shouldn’t have done this movie. One advice: Don’t work with Priyadarshan. The getting together of the two of you always leaves me low. First, Hulchul and now this one.
Rimi Sen is wasted yet again in a Priyan film (after GM). She has talent which needs to be utilized. Giving her such small, unimportant roles won’t do. Jackie Shroff does his part with conviction. Om Puri is stereotype, and fails to leave any mark. The rest are hardly noticable.
Music by Himesh appears decent while listening, but barring the two versions of the title track, the songs are out-of-place, and comes up without any valid situation. Or was the situation created to fit the songs?
N. Gopala and Arun Kumar's editing falls flat in this saga. Atleast half an hour of trimming in totality is required to make it somewhat tolerable. In fact, the slow pace is a major hindrance of the flick.
tHe fiNal sAy
Enough said Kareena. I know, it’s not possible for anyone to do well all the time, but you should have given a thought before signing this film. For the conclusion, I won’t speak of the entire film, but only about you, coz you were the one for whom I went for, in this movie. I was surprised to see you being promoted so much in the promos, but your absence in the movie was sorely felt. By me atleast.
All said... I am disappointed... I really am!
Yours lovingly always,
aLi.
© Aliasgar Poonawala, 2005
