Forgive me, for I have never seen masterpieces with bizarre titles like Zinda Laash, Khooni Dracula, Khooni Ilaka, Khooni Murda, Kabrastan, Jaadu Tona, Sar kata Insaan (what, you don?t believe me?), Khatarnaak International Gorillay (yes, honestly). But then, I have had the misfortune of watching Main Prem ki Diwani Hoon, Taal, Pardes, Yaadein, Mohabbatein, King Uncle, Koyla etc which according to me qualify as the deadliest of the deadly horror movies any day. Hey relax, I won?t reminisce about them here.
I promise to stick to stereotypic horror formula here. Although I admit that I haven?t watched so many flicks of this genre, there are still some memorable ones that I would like to recall here. And to begin with, a usual Ramsays kinda chiller thriller which has all the regular like rubber ape masks, red bulbs in lieu of eyes, fog, dog, bush, birds and kinds.
1. House No. 13 (House No. 13.. hehehe)
My cablewala gets the credit for making me watch this movie, twice at that. He promised to play my Hollywood requests of Speed and Fugitive, keeping me glued to my telly. But to my utter horror (pun intended), ended up airing this flick on both the occasions. It?s all about a haveli surrounded in thick dense fog on stormy heavily raining dark nights. Yes, fog and rains co-exist.
Cut 1: An artist is painting in the haveli and is distracted by a buxom bombshell who is dripping wet in the rains. So he offers her shelter, food, clothes, towel (2 reels dedicated on the lady drying up herself) and in return of this favour asks her for.. no perverts, he just wants her to model for a portrait, which she eagerly obliges. However, he notices after a while that the lady is not reflected in the adjacent mirror so goes near to check upon her and is choked beyond his belief that she is.. nah, I won?t reveal the mystery so soon.
Cut 2: Some eons later, a family of Anil Dhawan (or was it Vijendra Ghatge?), Reema Baduri, a kid daughter, a teenage sis and one grandpa come to live in this house. Initially nothing spooky happens.. except for some weird camera angles. Then the foggy mirror in granpa?s room start emitting smoke, paintings develop rashes and growing hair, but no one heeds to the old man. Then start usual ?horror? stuff ? doll in daughter?s room walks around, ropes coming out of walls to strangle people, dogs howling, fog getting denser (I think the sister gets raped too though I am not sure) and the family going through horrendous times hires a Tantrik, who unravels a secret door in the bookshelf leading to some hellish den of the Ghost or spirit or whatever it is (and don?t forget the smoke.. its everywhere, every frame, every scene, every bloody place).
And then begins the cat & mouse game of white saree clad, ghoulish looking matted long haired lady ghost.. looking so hilariously funny sans any denture, whitewashed face and criss-cross marks.. who indulges in letting loose army of demons while changing colours of lenses from golden to dirty green. And did I mention flashbacks and umpteen songs? At the end, if you are breathless with pangs of uncontrollable laughter and tears streaming down the eyes, blame it on your cablewala. I have long since stopped requesting anything.
2. Mangalsutra (Holy thread/ chain?)
It seems that my parents had taken me to its Kannada original unknowingly (mistaking it for a family affair), when I was aged 5 ? 6, and till date my mom recounts how I had screamed the whole night. But more recently when I watched the Hindi avtaar, Mangalsutra, on Zee, ROTFLing is all I could manage. This is not horror movie per se but a family drama starring Rekha and Anant Nag in the lead. Nevertheless, a ghost possesses Anant for three quarters of the movie and hence it qualifies a place here.
Rekha & Anant, a lovey dovey pair, is all ready to tie the knot with parents? blessings. But there?s this secretary Kamini in Anant?s office who has the hots for him, gets rejected and commits suicide vowing never to leave him in peace. Despite some outta nowhere auto events taking place (tick tock tick tock-ing of engagement rings, black ink getting spilled over Rekha?s photo, wedding invitations catching fire) the lead pair is married off. And in no time, Anant has a heavily powdered face, spiked hair, strange expressions and a superimposed Kamini?s ghost on him. The dutiful Sati Savitri Rekha prays and prays to Shivji and cries, prays some more and cries, prays cries? The ghost (Anant is too good in changeover female voice) challenges her to save her husband if she can and thus ensures the battle of divine and ghostly powers.
Since no prayers and tantrik magic worked, our Sati Savitri goes to Mahabaleshwar and is bringing back some special prasad for ghost busting. Alas, she meets with an accident pre-plotted by the ghost. So bleeding profusely, she literally crawls back home only to find the ghost has usurped the prasad. SS now takes matters into her hand, challenges Shivji that either he cure her husband or she would die before him.. and starts bashing her head in the mandir furiously. All this amidst furious storms / whirlwinds of dried leaves twirling about the house, cots spraying across ceilings amidst loud tau-ing... tau-ing.. tau-ing..tauing tauing tauing music in the background, fans switching on and off, Anant retching blood etc. Poor poor Shivji has no option but to relent and so you see a flame coming out of the statue and chasing the ghost far and wide finally setting it aflame in some abandoned well. Phew! I still can?t figure out what part made me scream after all.
3. Junoon (Obsession)
Heavily borrowed from Michael J. Fox?s Werewolf, the movie has repeated shots of a monkey.. err.. I mean Rahul Roy undergoing painful transformation into a.. TIGER. So first you see Rahul in long shot, then his eyes, then his nose and so on. And once the transformation begins.. you see nails growing out to become claws, whiskers developing, color lens for eyes, fangs/ teeth, yellow orange bands and then long shots of tiger, its eyes, its nose, its claws.. yawn! Anyways, story went like Rahul has his eyes set on Pooja Bhatt, who in turn has her cross-eyes set on Avinash Wadhawan. She ends up in Rahul?s bungalow on full moon night some day while he inch by inch transforms into a man-eater, so she is trapped. No idea what happens next, but I sincerely hoped Pooja and Rahul were both eaten up by that beast. If only wishes were horses, sigh!
4. Paapi Gudiya (Evil Doll)
I don?t remember much of this movie. Karisma and Avinash Wadhawan (again?!) lead in this flick where Shakti Kapoor is an ancient tantrik and hides his soul in some doll before dying. The evil doll incidentally falls into the hands of Karisma?s brother this century, and tries hard to possess a new body. Finally Karisma claps and the doll explodes.. or something like that.. well, I should not be listing it here when I don?t even remember its storyline straight. But then, isn?t that a good enough reason in itself? Anyways, all I can say is I don?t know which was more horror inducing.. whether the movie or Karisma & Avinash?s cheap and vulgar dancing.
Contd. in the comment's section.. sorry!
