Did someone say S*X?. Review on Cosmopolitan

My fingers nervously yet spiritedly rend the protective cover of the latest Cosmopolitan magazine. As I gawk at the sylphlike, impeccable model on the cover, I wonder if I’ve lost my mind! Do I really want to plummet into the “bimbos” world? Or am I being too hasty in my judgement. Am I being a conformist and priggish or am I just being investigational? Is that a pretense to a deeper, more ominous objective? You always try something twice right? Amidst all the voices in my head, I take the plunge into the steamy vortex of Cosmopolitan.

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I will endure this handbook of sex, love and rock and roll from cover to cover. I will be more chic when the section on beauty & fashion is past me. When I conclude this month’s Cosmo-quiz, I will know if I am a vamp or a victim. I will be more confident of myself when I am done with the article on “Know thyself”. I will analytically peruse this purported “womens magazine” and judge for myself as to its claim to the name. Now that I have psyched myself, I guess there’s no turning back.

After that steamy preamble, let us begin with the real review of this controversial magazine.

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What is it about?

Is it about some over-sexed nymphomaniacs wanting to garner a following of like-minded people? Or is it about some straight-laced puritans who have made this an outlet for their frustrations in a male-dominated society?

Either way, what has ensued here is an assortment of thoughts, observations, analyses and such-like to titillate and entertain the common man…err…woman! It would be reasonable to say that Cosmopolitan is a woman’s magazine though not entirely restricted to it. I doubt if a man has the fortitude.

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What’s in it?

The issues covered in this magazine are broadly classified into:

1.Cover stories: Read and learn of the personal dating lives of some big screen heart throbs and also some personal issues women may face in general. It covers topics on how to say no to unprotected sex to general life stories of successful and strong women.

2.Sex & love: Do I really need to delineate? If you insist….from the most provocative clothes to the most contemporary issues in todays fast-spinning world of free love and instant marriages, this section covers some of the most hyped up and over-exposed issues in the world of sex.

3.News features: heaven knows how they categorized this as such but its mostly more about you and your id. It’s more research on our inner impulses and its explosive communion with the general environment.

4.Beauty & fashion: another conduit through the long and torturous road called anorexia or you may want to take the by-lane through bulimia. It can be quite a valuable tool for the fashion-unconscious in keeping us updated to the new fashions in inner and outer wear.

5.Stars & entertainment news: some more Hollywood buzz and in the Indian version of Cosmo, Bollywood buzz. Who’s hot and who’s not? Who’s dating whom and the bedroom secrets of the rich and the famous. It’s all here!

6.Health & fitness: in my opinion, this should be given prominence. There is no short cut to fitness and Cosmo has a way of driving that point cleverly across to the reader.

7.Life & work: it’s not all about sex! Life is also about a career and your everyday problems. How do you get that promotion over your unscrupulous co-worker? How do you plan a perfect romantic weekend? It’s all here!

8.All about men: if men can’t understand women, it’s vice versa for the women! How do you crack that smooth veneer to get to the real man? Is this Mr. Right?

9.In every issue: these are the topics, which appear in every Cosmo mag compulsorily. It comprises mainly of the Editors note, the Bedside astrologer, shopping information, Agony Aunt, etc…

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Who reads this stuff?

It’s an entertainment magazine. It empowers the working woman to want more than a pay check ! It’s a bungee jump into a seldom-explored avenue. It’s a sneak peek into the vibrant world of a woman’s mind. It’s a small walk on the wild side!

I would assume that the magazine targets those rebellious women of society but it also can be the compliant homemakers window to the world outside. It’s a return flight from reality to a world where women can find themselves in the lexis of this magazine.

I wouldn’t read this religiously but it does have its strong points. I certainly don’t want to know about someone else’s pillow talk but circumventing a potential cat fight is a piece of information that I would store for later use! Who’s pillowing with whom and why and the other masochistic and sordid details are not my cuppa but how do I know I’m begin passed over for a promotion and how I will be able to address a potentially dangerous life-threatening situation is something I do want to know.

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Subsequent to my conclusion of this magazine, and a few burnt fingers, I will end with a statutory warning to all readers:

“The publishers, writers, editors and others associated with this magazine are not liable for prosecution should the reader find the contents presumptuous and intrepid. Liability is also denied for any damage caused to readers who are rendered catatonic due to certain articles in this publication. Any damage caused to limbs and other organs of readers is not ground for filing a suit with the publishers and supporters of Cosmopolitan magazine.”