Cash crunch. Review on Cash

Once upon a time there was a movie called Cash. It was conceived with lot of anubhav inside a laboratory. The movie was made of buxom chicks, high kicks, unshaven dudes, cool shades, black gangees, white jackets, fast moving objects, cops, robbers, diamonds and some hatke music from the Big Shaker. Based on the stars it was suppose to live long. Critics and audience mauled it to death in the first weekend itself.

Genetically the lab wanted to create Cash as a clone of Dus. Unfortunately the experiment went astray and we, the audience could only watch a version, mutated beyond recognition. It started with a flashback, promised a few diamond heists, lapsed into sporadic animations, sprouted some romance and then burst into absolute mayhem in the end. It is like attending the cremation of a headless entertainer wandering aimlessly downhill.

All engineers know that the design mix of concrete is extremely important. A mistake in that and the whole building can come crashing down. Well…in our case…..Cash crashed in its first weekend.

The engineers of Cash, unfortunately, spent more time designing the looks of their lead actors and action set pieces and conveniently thought screenplay, story, music  and characterization are not important in a movie.

The cast was wasted as the director forgot that unlike models, actors can also act. He also made the cardinal sin of turning Ajay Devgun into a liability, rather than an asset for his movie. This is what happens when you spend your formative years making music videos for Sonu Nigam and Abhijeet.

Can you imagine the only character which shines through in this supposedly slick action flick is played by an unknown actor who has by now become famous as the Dhundla guy? The problem with the rest was that you never identify with any of them. In fact most of time I was keeping myself occupied thinking about the permutations and combinations possible if the male actors switches their roles and female actors switches their roles. In fact I realized that it would have made no difference at all…..I would still be watching this stupid film and cursing Anil Ambani.

Money for nothing and chicks for free should be the official anthem of this movie. Shamita, Isha, Dia and an unknown item girl tried their best to keep the male population occupied. God bless them for small mercies.

The blame for this debacle rest squarely on the director. He wanted to do a slick gritty hollywood style action flick but goofed it up royally by assuming camera angles, foreign locales, designer clothes and actors frollicking in branded cars can rake in the moolah.

So what should the budding movie makers learn from this movie:

Never make a move where the Hero is named Doc and the villain is called Uncle.

Ensure that you do not need Sudoku masters to decipher your plotline.

Get inspired by the wine, not the bottle.

Sunil and Dia will soon be termed camels considering the number of cameos they do.

Have mercy for your audience. Do not expect the same otherwise.